On Father's Day

In honor of Father’s Day I decided to make a list of 50 things I love about Taylor. I could go on and on, but my kids only nap for so long :) Some of them are obvious things and some of them are things that you probably didn’t know about him. I followed it up with the answer to 25 questions about him.

1. He puts up with me
2. He never complains about anything I do or do not do (however I’m sure he has a list of complaints somewhere).
3. If he is around he changes the diapers. Always.
4. He is happy to leave Sacrament Meeting to take a kid out.
5. He lets me sleep in often.
6. He reads to me.
7. He edits the swearing when he reads to me.
8. He embellishes the, um, “love” scenes when he reads to me.
9. He starts the laundry a lot.
10. He starts the dishwasher and puts away the dishes.
11. He can fold clothes better than I can.
12. He does more than his fair share of putting Claire back in bed in the middle of the night.
13. He always dresses nicely when we leave the house.
14. He drives me everywhere.
15. He carries the car seat.
16. He buckles both kids in every time.
17. He’s at about 97% at putting the toilet seat down (you can understand how surprising the remaining 3% is as I usually realize that in the dark).
18. I usually only have to ask him one time to do anything. Usually.
19. He kept our sidewalk better shoveled than any of the neighbors this winter.
20. He’s willing to spend more time than I am to find just the right jeans for me.
21. He does the Hot Dog Dance with Claire.
22. He takes Claire on little adventures to ride the bus, buy cookies, and stop at the Doggie Store, so that I can get a break.
23. He’s our post-Church mac-n-cheese maker.
24. He’s always in charge of making rice.
25. He’s always in charge of making pasta.
26. I’ve taken over the tools and fix everything in the house. He’s okay with that.
27. He squashes all the spiders.
28. He’s made a couple valiant attempts to fix car problems.
29. On more than one occasion Taylor has left to buy me medicine in the middle of the night.
30. On many occasions Taylor has gone to the store to fulfill my pregnancy cravings.
31. He tucks me in every night.
32. He goes to the gym regularly. He says it’s to impress me. Though sometimes I think it is to get away from me.
33. He and Claire do about 80% of the grocery shopping lately.
34. He has finally learned how to use apostrophes correctly.
35. He gets about 70% of his commas in the correct place and can correctly identify most conjunctions.
36. I find lists all over the house. Usually they contain a few sports names or teams I recognize. I’m humored by his need to categorize things.
37. Taylor is actually a very talented artist.
38. He has perfect handwriting (especially with contrasted with my horrible handwriting).
39. His scriptures are very used and very marked.
40. He has insightful comments in Church.
41. He can name every prophet in order.
42. He can name all the general authorities.
43. He can even tell you their approximate ages are and a number of other life facts about them.
44. I married Taylor because he listens and retains information that is important to me.
45. I have a complete inability to remember to watch my favorite TV shows. Taylor makes sure to record our shows—and he even reminds me that Days of Our Lives is on if he is home at 2:00.
46. He brags about his new “sexy” haircut.
47. He makes sure I get my Sunday naps.
48. He pushes the stroller on our walks unless I feel particularly ambitious.
49. He lets me make most of our family decisions and goes along with my ideas.
50. He’s a wonderful father.



25 Things about my love
1. What is his name? Taylor Cameron Herrin
2. Who eats more? Usually Taylor. But if I’m pregnant or nursing 8 hours a day, and especially if we’re eating french toast, I can easily top him.
3. Who said I love you first? I did. His response? “That was brave, Jac.” He claims he was going to say it later that evening.
4. Who is taller? He is by a few inches.
5. Who is smarter? Definitely Taylor. Although for some reason he thinks the opposite.
6. Who is more sensitive? It’s a toss up. We’re quite equal in a lot of ways. Although I do expect him to read my mind and get upset when he doesn’t.
7. Who does the laundry? Taylor did it exclusively until we had Claire. Now it’s shared, but I should do more.
8. Who sleeps on the right side of the bed? If we’re in bed he’s on the right. We both like to face the outside of the bed, and my eye problems made it so I could only be on my left side, so that’s how that happened.
9. Who pays the bills? I do. Taylor’s still a little confused by online bill pay.
10. Who cooks more? I cook meals, and Taylor cooks quick things that we tell ourselves are meals (things that come from bags).
11. What meals do you cook together? If we are making something that requires rice, Taylor is the man for the rice. If we are having pancakes or other breakfast foods, he’s the man for the eggs.
12. Who is more stubborn? I am. Enough said.
13. Who is the first to admit they're wrong? We actually agree on most things. If we don’t, we agree to disagree and that’s that.
14. Who is cleaner? I’ll admit I’m not a neat freak. I wish I was, but I can’t find it within myself. Taylor’s better at being tidy.
15. Who has more siblings? I do. I have two brothers and a sister. He has one sister.
16. Who wears the pants in the relationship? I do, but only because I’ve borrowed them with permission. Like I said before, I make the decisions, and he goes along with what I want. Unless it’s in ordering a drink to share. It’s always Coke though I like root beer.
17. What do you like to do together? We like to play frisbee, go on walks, watch our TV shows, read books, stay up late talking, drive, talk about the news and school, play with our kids, talk about how cute our kids are....lots of things.
18. Who eats more sweets? It depends, but if you’re going with portion size, he’s got me.
19. Guilty pleasures? American Idol. We wouldn’t miss an episode (that’s not true, we don’t watch the result shows). We go through root beer float stages where we have them every night for weeks.
20. How did you meet? Neither of us can remember actually meeting. Therefore Taylor makes up the story. He was just at his parent’s house while I was getting my fittings for Miss America during the summer of 2001. Our first date was in January 2002.
21. Who asked who out first? Taylor’s mom kind of got the whole thing rolling and convinced him to call me (But, this is after I received his family’s Christmas card, remembered how cute he is, and emailed his mom about going out with him.)
22. Who kissed who first? I waited THREE months of dating for him to get up the guts to kiss me (he claims that he was simply building the anticipation). By the time he did I already knew I wanted to marry him.
23. Who proposed? Well, there was an official proposal which he did perform. But about two months prior to it I basically told him he would marry me. He hasn’t complained about it yet.
24. His best features? Taylor is really easy going and level-headed. He’s a wonderful father. He has beautiful eyes. I love to hug him because he has such a broad chest and shoulders—it makes me feel small.
25. What is his greatest quality? Taylor is dedicated and motivated. His motivation is actually the #1 thing that attracted me to him when we were dating. Along with that he has a strong testimony of the gospel and actively seeks to improve both the depth and breadth of his gospel knowledge. When I married him I knew that we would always be spiritually secure and that he would live up to his temple covenants. I know he’ll never let me down.

Thought on repentance

Last week in Sunday School the teacher made an analogy that I wanted to pass on. We were talking about repentance and moving on past mistakes in life. She said that life is like driving. Sometimes we'll be driving along and get in an accident. We have to stop, make arrangements to cover the damages, then we get back on the road. However, if after leaving the site of the accident we continue to look at the accident in our rear view mirror we cannot make much forward progress. And if we constantly look back and dwell on the accident, we can cause a lot more accidents. Sure, we have to occasionally glance at what is behind us, but must decide to learn from our past mistakes and move on, looking forward and toward our destination. Going further with the analogy, it's easy to think of the Savior to be like car insurance. We cause an accident; we pay as much as we can, and he makes up for the rest of it.

Just wanted to share the thought.

The saga continues

So I saw my surgeon again today. We've decided to save money and not have any work done on the prosthetic until after my surgeries. I'm not very thrilled about it, but have learned to deal with they eye I have. Again, with the intent of not telling the story and drawing the picture a million times, here's the plan:

To explain what will happen I've included a little visual I cooked up. It's not too impressive, but will do. The picture on the left is a normal eye. Notice all the yellow squiggly stuff? That's fat. Apparently we all have a lot of fat surrounding our eyes and holding them in place. Because I had glaucoma that fat got squished because of my eye enlarging from pressure. The blood supply to the fat was also compromised during my 13 previous eye surgeries. This is not good for fat. This is why I have a hollowness next to my nose and a gap on the outside. This is shown in the upper right picture. The pink is the ball that now fills what is left of my eye, and the blue is the prosthetic. They sit deep in my eye because of the lack of fat volume. I'm told that a normal eye is 30cc's (whatever a cc is), and normal implants are 18 cc's, and mine is 20--the largest possible. It still however is not as big as it should be.

So the solution is to go in under the eyeball and socket and to add a few plastic pieces (shown in purple) to bump the eye up and a few plastic wedges to encourage it forward. Oh, and it doesn't just bump the eyeball, it bumps the eye tissue. It sounds painful. Then they inject something that will fill the upper part right next to the eyelid. They will also most likely tighten up my bottom lid. If all goes well about 8 weeks after that I'll have upper eyelid surgery.

So we scheduled the surgery for August 8. It takes about 2 hours. Right now my insurance won't cover my eye problems (stupid insurance). So we're trying to come up with creative ways to get immediate insurance that will. The best thing would be for Taylor to be employed by the state with DCFS or something for the last half of the summer. The state of Utah has great coverage that starts the day you start. If anyone else has suggestions for companies that have good insurance or any other insurance ideas, feel free to comment.

Long Day

Some days are longer than others. Some have really long parts. Today was a long day with a long part. One of the things I dreaded about having two children was going to the store with them and without another adult. Today I ventured to Walmart for a couple grocery items, Father's Day item, and other stuff. As I went to get Claire out of the car I stepped in gum. If that wasn't enough of a sign to just go back home, I should have turned around when the pharmacy line was literally to the doors. I just thought I was lucky to not need drugs today.

We needed WD4o. I consider myself a modern woman, and I'm not intimidated by tools or repairs of any kind. This should make me capable of finding WD40. Oh no. Of course it would be by screws and picture hangers. Then there were two Father's Day items that I was certain would be at Walmart. I looked and looked to no avail. Then I decided that I could ask for help---if only someone spoke English. I gave up after a valiant effort.

Next it was time for the groceries. I started getting the baby food when Claire announced she needed to use the potty. She went before we left home, so I wasn't too worried. We got a few more things and she mentioned it again. Then we couldn't find beef bullion cubes or frozen hamburger patties. Then she said she really needed to go, so I bypassed the produce and breads and headed straight to checkout. The lines were horrendous. I got in what I assumed was the smallest line, only to find half-way into it that the woman three people in front of me was so large that she blocked the view of her very full cart. Then there was a lady next to us who had very obvious birthmarks. Claire told me very loudly, "Oh look! That MAN got hurt on his neck." This was repeated a couple times before I could distract her. And she never got the gender correct.

Next thing I know Kyle goes from sitting pleasantly to red-faced screaming. As it was almost my turn to load my items I was unsure of what to do. I got them all loaded while trying to calm him. Then the nice lady behind me asks if she could hold him with an explanation that her grandkids live far away. This was either true, he was being much more annoying than I thought, or maybe she just wanted to hold our cute boy (who really does have a cute pathetic cry).

By this point we've been in line twenty minutes. Claire keeps pulling things off the conveyor belt and chewing on them. My head hurts. It's like 90 degrees, and the lady in front of me can't decide if she wants to buy pillows after finding out their price. All the while I'm waiting for Claire to announce that she's had an accident. Kyle, by the way, is quite happy and gaining an audience of well-wishers. I offered to take him back, but she wouldn't give him back. I wasn't too sure what to do. When I was paying for my stuff I couldn't get Claire far enough away from the credit card thing to stop pushing buttons. She messed it up twice. We spent well over 25 minutes in line. Not fun.

I finally got everything loaded in, expressed gratitude to the baby holder, put Kyle in his chair, and now Claire says she doesn't need to use the bathroom, she wants to go sit on the big toy machines (she still hasn't figured out that putting money in them makes them way more fun). So we sat on Tigger, Mickey, and the spaceship. After some coaxing we loaded everyone in the car, fortunately avoiding the gum this time around. We got home, and I went to get Kyle only to find that I had never strapped him in (I'm admitting this only because Shannon admitted to making the same error more than once).

So that was our fun, fun trip which I will not repeat any time soon. Oh, and during dinner Claire pushed her booster seat off her chair and it broke an outlet cover. Good thing bedtime is in an hour (if I'm lucky!).

Funny Claire

Last night just before bed Claire turned to Taylor and said, "So, where are you going tomorrow, Dad?" He replied that in the morning he'd go to the gym, then to class and be home a little after 11. Then he'd go to the family institute from about 2:30 to 7:30. Her reply, "Um, so what time are you going to the gym?" First of all, how did she even notice that he didn't give a time for that? And secondly, can she really have a concept of time at all? Sure, she can accurately count to 13, but she can't always accurately count objects, so I don't think she really understands numbers. Yet she has an obsession with time. She's always asking what time it is and what at what time she will be doing her regular activities. Maybe she needs a watch.

Also, Taylor's story about Claire's foot getting stuck in the shopping cart (see his previous post) reminded me about another incident. Last January Taylor was set apart to be a teacher in the Elder's Quorum. Kyle was all of a few weeks old, so I was holding him. Claire sneaked off and started playing with a chair---the plastic stacking kind found in most churches. I thought she'd be fine, so I kind of closed my eyes for the setting apart. Suddenly I hear, "Help! Help!" and I opened my eyes to see Claire stuck in the chair with her head and one arm through the hole in the back. She was backing up as crazily as a cat with a lampshade stuck on its head. I panicked a little about what to do with Kyle, ended up setting him on the ground and went to help Claire untangle herself---it was not easy. All the while there is a poor man trying to perform the blessing and everyone was trying not to look. It ended quickly, we're not sure what was even said, and everyone had a good laugh once I explained the situation. She's a little nutty, and that's all there is to it.

Eye update

Just so I don't have to repeat this information a million times, here's the update.

I saw another ocularist (prosthetic eye maker) in Salt Lake yesterday. I just wanted to get a second opinion on my eye as I'm so disappointed with it. She felt like I was definitely justified in my concerns. It really is the wrong color, the outer ring really is too wide, it isn't aligned correctly, it's too small, and there really isn't enough sclera (white part) next to my nose. She said that the surgery part looks like it went well, but the prosthetic is a failure. She was also much more compassionate than the guy we previously worked with, and seemed to see me as a person, not just another case.

Though I'm extremely disappointed that I really did just get a bad deal, I do feel better knowing that I'm not just being overly sensitive like a lot of people have been telling me (if I hear "I can't tell which eye it is" one more time I'll go crazy!). She feels quite confident that we can at least get the eyeball itself to look exactly like the other, and that with a surgery on both my eyelids I should be a more satisfied.

So for right now it looks like I may be cancelling my appointment to get work on the eye done next week. I'm doing this because it's super expensive to do, and apparently I'll need a brand new eye after the surgeries anyway, so it seems ridiculous to pay so much in our situation where my insurance doesn't cover prosthetics . These eyes are not cheap. The woman I saw yesterday also wants to give me a discount in exchange for using me in advertising---which seems like a great situation, because if she's advertising with me I assume she'll do her very best work. So we have a lot of phone calls and decisions to make, but that's the update for now.

One of the dumbest things I ever did

I was talking to my dad the other day and told him a story about what a couple friends and I did when we were in high school. Looking back I can't believe how incredibly stupid and risky it was for us to do what we did. It's funny how as a teenager you really just can't see consequences very clearly. Anyway, here's the story. The people in it are pictured above from left to right: Michelle, Bryce, Ashleigh (not in the story, but still in the picture), Lee, and me. I think I have the story right, but it has been ten years (yikes! we're old), so, Lee & Michelle, let me know if I'm wrong.

This must have happened during our junior year. Michelle, Bryce, and I were in Bryce's van at the Phillips station getting gas and there were two empty parking stalls in front of us. One of the stalls had what looked like an empty paper bag in it. A car full of seniors guys that we knew pulled into the stall next to the bag. One of them got out, picked up the bag, got back into the car and drove away. We weren't stupid. We were 90% sure that the bag contained drugs. Any normal person may report it to police or just let it go. But not us. Our gas was done pumping and
we were in hot pursuit. We followed the car through the back roads of Lehi for a really long time. They must have known we were following them because they kept trying to lose us, but we kept finding them. At one point they threw the bag out of the car. We of course stopped to retrieve it. We threw it in the van and then continued the pursuit. I don't remember who opened the bag, but I do remember that it took quite a while for one of us to get enough courage to open it (and all the while we were still following them)! We opened the bag and it contained......(drum roll please)......some stale carrots! True story. But it doesn't end there. At that point we rallied and decided to go switch cars and pick up Lee (I think). So we got in Michelle's big white boat of a car, got Lee, drove back to the southern most parts of Lehi and amazingly found the car again. Michelle continued following them, and at this point I'm guessing it has been well over an hour that we've followed them. The height of our evening occurred when they drove into a dead end and turned their car so that they couldn't help but see who their followers were. All of this time we had not considered what would happen when we caught up with them or had to face them. All the while we're facing the immediate need to flip a U-turn in a huge car with these questionably drug-using senior boys waiting for us.I will never forget crouching on the floor
of the car with Bryce. Michelle was screaming "What do I do? What do I do?!" And Bryce yells back, "I don't know what you're going to do Michelle, but you better think of something, and you better think of something fast!" That moment really is one of favorite memories from all of high
school. Michelle did the only thing one can do when coming to a dead end. She slowly, slowly did a three-point turn, which inevitably was five- or six-point turn because of the size of her car and narrowness of the road. The whole time the boys are sitting there with their headlights on our car. I can just see it from their point of view with Michelle, frantic, white-knuckled, and white-faced and the rest of us wimps safely tucked nearly underneath the dash and other chairs. And we drove home. And that was that.

So I told my dad this story, and couldn't believe how stupid we were. These boys obviously had picked up drugs (though what a weird way to distribute them). It couldn't have been anything else. I don't have a lot of experience with drug users, but I'm willing to bet they were ready to fight for the drugs or to protect themselves. I don't think they got a glimpse of who was following them until the end, so they must have been pretty scared. I also remember that when we found the carrots we didn't consider that perhaps they were NOT the original contents of the bag. And I think it is so weird that we were able to leave and switch cars, come back and pick up where we left off. We NEVER considered what we would do if they stopped to confront us. We never even had a clear goal of what we were trying to accomplish in the first place. I guess that just shows that even though we thought we were in an elite group in school, and more intelligent and thinking than a lot of our counterparts, we were still just stupid teenagers who weren't thinking and could have gotten in a whole lot of trouble.

So there's my story. I guess if that's the worst of it I'm pretty lucky :)Think about the dumb things you did when you were a teenager and didn't think ahead about the consequences. Maybe post them on your blog so we can all laugh too.

More Potty Success!

I'm sure all of our MANY readers will thrill to hear this news...however if you aren't a parent yet and you are not yet surrounded by constant talk of diapers and potties and other such delightful things, you may want to skip this post. Claire has now worn her panties for almost the entirety of the last three days. We started telling her we were busy when she asked us to change her diaper. After a couple times of waiting 4-5 minutes she has started to think it may be better to just use the potty. We even went to two stores yesterday and a restaurant today (to celebrate her success) without a diaper on. She even asked to use the potty at the restaurant.

It has been fun to see her gain confidence and figure out how to do all of this. She does a great little "potty dance" and so do we :). She's been great at getting to the potty every time, except tonight when she ran to go and we discovered that we had forgotten to put the bowl back in her potty after the last cleaning. She had a tiny tiny tiny accident and cried so hard. It nearly broke my heart to see how upset she was.

Her little chart is filling up fast, and the rewards are definitely encouraging her. Because last night she finally managed to do #2 (maybe that's TMI?) we got her the bathroom set for her dollhouse(with a toilet AND a potty chair and tub and vanity) , and my parents got her the living room set, complete with a mommy dog and four puppies. For some reason this has all been terribly frightening for her, and she's been so brave. This is definitely progress, and perhaps we have bought her last box of diapers---yeah!

On Mother's Day

Well, it’s Mother’s Day and I need to pay tribute. I have been surrounded by some of the best mothers in the world, especially my wife. Jac is the best person I know and I am forever grateful to be sealed to her for Time and all Eternity. I have several goals in life and I have managed to accomplish the most important one—marry someone who is out of my league. I’ve clearly married up and am thankful for that every day of my life. My wife is probably the toughest person I know. She has been through many trials in her life and has consistently found ways to improve herself through those trials. I have always viewed trials as evidence that God sees us as worthy to prepare for exaltation, and Jac has been a constant strength through the trials our family has faced. It makes it easier when I recognize that we are being prepared for Eternal life—together.
Some lyrics from one of my favorite songs have always intrigued me:
I've never been the praying kind
But lately I've been down upon my knees
Not looking for a miracle
Just a reason to believe
I love those lyrics because I think that all of us are looking for a reason to believe. Even though I do view it as a miracle, the most obvious reason for me to "believe" is my family. Nothing keeps me going the way my family does.
In the last few years I have seen my wife take on the role of mother. She is amazing and I could not fathom a better mother for my children. She is kind, patient, and loving toward Kyle and Claire, even when we experience the weeping and wailing and gnashing of teeth. It has been Jac’s dream to be a mother. People often encourage her to write a book or do other innovative and impressive things, but for Jac all these things take a backseat to being a mom. I know she will pursue those things later in life (and have no doubts that she will accomplish them), but for now she just wants to be a mother. Considering all of her accomplishments in life, that is amazing.
People often tell us how lucky we are that our kids are so good. It baffles me that people seem to miss the obvious—we have great kids because they have a great mother. I took some time this week to sit down and think about my life and all of the blessings I have received, and it became obvious that I am a very lucky man. I have beautiful kids and I am married to the girl of my dreams. Five years in and I can say—unequivocally—I would do it all over again because any trials we face together have been worth it. Jac, I love you, and I appreciate everything you do as a mother to hold this family together. Forever.

Happy Mother's Day

There are four days of my life that would fit into "Best Day of My Life" or "Most Pivotal Day of My Life." They are: the day I won Miss Utah, the day we were married, the day Claire was born, and the day Kyle was born (pictured above at the moments I first saw them).

If I got to choose to re-live two days of my life, I would choose the day my children were born. (Only beating the wedding day because we get to kind of re-live that every time we do sealings---and it was really, really cold. Although significantly less painful than childbirth when I think about it...) Anyway---even though I'm only 27, I've got to do some really cool things in life. I spoke at my high school graduation, I won a couple pageants, I competed at Miss America, I've done a lot of things with organ donation and other community service opportunities. I've been a lot of places and met a lot of people, but the experience that I treasure most is that of being a mother. Being Miss Utah was great, but I'd give it up in a heartbeat for my two babies.

Today in Church a sister announced her latest pregnancy as "a promotion at work." And my "work" certainly has been interesting since Claire was born. I've never been more bored or more busy. I've never been more challenged or more care-free. I've certainly never been as good at coloring before.

I have never felt more deeply about anyone or anything since my two "co-workers" joined my life. They have taught me about the love of God. They have helped me understand the love that my parents must have for me. They have taught me why it is important for families to be together forever. They have shown me unconditional and unfailing love. They have brought out sides to me that I never knew existed. (For instance, I DANCE to "Popcorn Popping" almost daily---sometimes even with the curtains open!)

I admire Claire's sensitive soul and empathetic disposition along with her zaniness and interest in life. I was so stressed out during Kyle's pregnancy that I thought for sure he'd be a high-strung demanding baby, but he is constantly happy and smiling and ready to roll with any punches we send his way (figuratively, of course). Just one dimpled grin from either of them sends me over the edge with happiness and gratitude that they are mine. I am so glad that I am a mother. And I am so glad that I have a husband who supports me in my desire to be a full-time mom. His sacrifices are not un-noticed although they are often un-thanked (there's probably a better word for that).

However, as wonderful as I have made motherhood seem, there are days when I am certain I (or my children) will not survive. And sure enough my own mother is there to rescue me. Whether she is here in person, on the phone listening to me complain, or the voice that I hear in my head, my mother influences my life daily. I may have said this many times before, but it bears repeating: I need my mom more now than I ever have before. I don't think parenting ever ends; there will always be more life situations for which I will need guidance. So, thanks mom! And thanks also to Taylor's mom who is also always there for us and helps out at the perfect time in unmeasurable ways.

So Happy Mother's Day to all you mothers reading this. Thank you for all your hard work and dedication. Now lets all go have a nap.